Christmas Eve is usually a day of work and rushing about before falling into bed. Today was different; I’d booked the day off work so had time to do lots of things but at a leisurely pace.
Errands were ran in the morning, a lazy soup filled lunch followed before train track building then a trip to the village church for the crib service. The evening soon followed with gingerbread house making, new pyjamas and the usual Christmas traditions of mince pies and a drink for Santa. This evening was gentle, calm and filled with love.
There was a wobble in the middle of the evening with plans for tomorrow morning suddenly changing but that was easily sorted with an honest reply and an apology for me being difficult and awkward. Christmas isn’t usually a time to be selfish but it is sometimes needed for self preservation!
We usually hang stockings up ready to be filled but this year it seemed so wrong to hang only three or hang four but leave one empty so instead they have remained unhung then filled and left on the half landing for Toby to find in the morning.
Whilst the day has been special and relaxed there is no way of hiding the fact that there is a Rory shaped hole in the day. As the evening drew quieter and friends sent lovely kind Christmas messages the tears flowed. The television is currently blaring out the words ‘o come let us adore him’ which is quite apt. I adore my special boy, he is the reason we have had such a lovely day – this year I needed to avoid our usual routine and we had a better calmer day as a result. Rory, I’m so sorry you can’t be here in person but thank you for the day we had and thank you for touching our hearts.
Wishing everyone a gentle peaceful Christmas.