That Question

I was in London on Wednesday on a course. Nerve wracking as I don’t like the crowded tube – too many worries of fires, bombs and crashes underground and anxiety about meeting lots of new people I didn’t know. It was all fine of course! The tube was crowded and dirty but sailed smoothly to Stratford and the people on the course were very nice and some interesting perspectives were shared.

It was a course about managing mental health in the workplace, an important subject and one close to my heart these days.

Whilst working in a small group one of the ladies commented on my print necklace. She said how pretty it was. I replied saying it was all of my boys. The other lady asked ‘that’ question, the one that loss parents dread… ‘how many do you have?’ Usually I freeze and say just the one, but that didn’t feel like the right answer given that I’d mentioned plural rather than singular boys. My reply, after a deep breath was that I have a living five year old and we lost two boys at 23 weeks in 2015 and 2016. 

It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be and the ladies said all the usual kind words and we moved on to the task in hand.

This is only the third or fourth time I’ve been honest about the number of children I have to a stranger. It was scary but it felt good to be honest and to acknowledge all of my children. 

I need to do this more often! 


2 thoughts on “That Question

  1. I think all too often we are more worried about upsetting others with honesty rather than realising that although it is not easy to do, it is in fact cathartic and can sometimes have the benefit of allowing others in the same situation to no longer feel alone and be able to open up too. We’ll done for your courage. X

    Liked by 1 person

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